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Esther Perel


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Esther Perel is a Belgian psychotherapist and the New York Times bestselling author of The State of Affairs and Mating in Captivity. Her celebrated TED talks have garnered more than 20 million views and she is also the host of the popular podcast Where Should We Begin?
20 books on this list
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If This Is a Man and The Truce
by Primo Levi (Jul 04, 2003)
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'With the moral stamina and intellectual poise of a twentieth-century Titan, this slightly built, dutiful, unassuming chemist set out systematically to remember the German hell on earth, steadfastly to think it through, and then to render it comprehensible in lucid, unpretentious prose. He was profoundly in touch with the minutest workings of the m...
Esther Perel
One of the most powerful books one ought to read.     source
This book is also recommended by
David Blaine
Nonviolent Communication
A Language of Life
by Marshall B. Rosenberg (Sep 01, 2015)
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The latest edition of the communication guide that has sold more than 1,000,000 copies An enlightening look at how peaceful communication can create compassionate connections with family, friends, and other acquaintances, this international bestseller uses stories, examples, and sample dialogues to provide solutions to communication problems both ...
Esther Perel
I think that this book is a classic for anyone who is thinking relationships.     source
Man's Search for Meaning
by Viktor E. Frankl (Jun 01, 2006)
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Psychiatrist Viktor Frankl's memoir has riveted generations of readers with its descriptions of life in Nazi death camps and its lessons for spiritual survival. Based on his own experience and the stories of his patients, Frankl argues that we cannot avoid suffering but we can choose how to cope with it, find meaning in it, and move forward with re...
Esther Perel
The book I’ve probably gifted the most is Man's Search for Meaning, since I’m 16.     source
Crime and Punishment
by Fyodor Dostoevsky (Jan 24, 2017)
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Raskolnikov, a destitute and desperate former student, wanders through the slums of St Petersburg and commits a random murder without remorse or regret. He imagines himself to be a great man, a Napoleon: acting for a higher purpose beyond conventional moral law. But as he embarks on a dangerous game of cat and mouse with a suspicious police investi...
Esther Perel
You can reread the Russians. They are timeless.     source
This book is also recommended by
PewDiePieJordan PetersonJim CramerBen Domenech
How to Fix a Broken Heart
by Dr Guy Winch (Feb 13, 2018)
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Imagine if we treated broken hearts with the same respect and concern we have for broken arms? Psychologist Guy Winch urges us to rethink the way we deal with emotional pain, offering warm, wise, and witty advice for the broken-hearted.Real heartbreak is unmistakable. We think of nothing else. We feel nothing else. We care about nothing else. Yet w...
Esther Perel
Well-researched and deeply practical, How to Fix A Broken Heart provides the validation, comfort, and hope anyone who is heartbroken desperately needs. Weaving compelling case studies from his private practice with surprising scientific findings, Winch illustrates how little we actually know about this universal experience and why our misconceptions will set us back and delay our recovery. This compassionate and eye-opening book is a must read for anyone mourning a lost love or a cherished pet, and a compelling argument for recognizing these poorly acknowledged forms of grief.     source
The Erotic Mind
Unlocking the Inner Sources of Passion and Fulfillment
by Jack Morin (Aug 02, 1996)
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Challenging accepted theories about what makes for terrific sex, The Erotic Mind is a breakthrough exploration of the least understood dimensions of human sexuality—the psychology of desire, arousal, and fulfillment. Nationally known sex therapist Dr. Jack Morin offers a bold new perspective that celebrates the joys of Eros without denying its risk...
Esther Perel
I reread.     source
Taking Sexy Back
How to Own Your Sexuality and Create the Relationships You Want
by Alexandra H. Solomon PhD (Feb 02, 2020)
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It is time for a new sexual revolution. Its time to take sexy back.As women, were expected to be sexy, but not sexual. Were bombarded with conflicting, shame-inducing, and disempowering messages about sex, instead of being encouraged to connect with our true sexual selves. Sexy gets reduced to a performance, leaving us with little to no space to re...
Esther Perel
Taking Sexy Back is going directly on my top list of recommended sexuality readings. Not only did I learn a lot, but I also enjoyed the ease, directness, and warmth with which Solomon guides us to deeper sexual and relational self-awareness. An invitation we can’t refuse!     source
Sync Your Relationship, Save Your Marriage
Four Steps to Getting Back on Track
by Peter Fraenkel Ph.D. (Mar 15, 2011)
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Award-winning couples therapist Peter Fraenkel argues that most relationship problems can be traced to partners being out of sync on the powerful but mostly hidden dimension of time.  Differences in daily rhythms, personal pace, punctuality, time perspective, and priorities about how time is allocated can all lead to couple conflict.  Yet the fasci...
Esther Perel
Peter Fraenkel puts forth some of the most pertinent and useful ideas about the time famine that afflicts couples today. You must take the time, read this timely book and find out how you can redeem your relationship from the time crunch. Peter Fraenkel is an inspiring writer and an inspired therapist. You are sure to enjoy your time with him.     source
Family Healing
Tales of Hope and Renewal from Family Therapy by Salvador Minuchin (1992-11-23)
Esther Perel
It will change your whole way of understanding relationships.     source
Fighting for Your Marriage
A Deluxe Revised Edition of the Classic Best-seller for Enhancing Marriage and Preventing Divorce
by Howard J. Markman (Apr 26, 2010)
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A thorough revision with a new DVD of couples in action, using the PREP method for strengthening marriage and avoiding divorce courtThe third edition of the best-selling classic on marriage enhancement and divorce prevention, features the latest research and changes of heart in our culture and society. New and revised, "Fighting for Your Marriage" ...
Esther Perel
On its surface, it’s a book about marriage of course, but you just go one layer deeper and it’s a study of the underlying issues that shape the way that we relate.     source
Can Love Last?
The Fate of Romance over Time (Norton Professional Books (Paperback))
by Stephen A. Mitchell (Feb 17, 2003)
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Common wisdom has it that love is fragile, but leading psychoanalyst Stephen A. Mitchell argues that romance doesn't actually diminish in long-term relationships—it becomes increasingly dangerous. What we regard as the transience of love is really risk management. Mitchell shows that love can endure, if only we become aware of our self-destructive ...
Esther Perel
Was part of the spine of my book 'Mating In Captivity.'     source
The Art of Loving
by Erich Fromm (Aug 06, 2019)
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The fiftieth Anniversary Edition of the groundbreaking international bestseller that has shown millions of readers how to achieve rich, productive lives by developing their hidden capacities for loveMost people are unable to love on the only level that truly matters: love that is compounded of maturity, self-knowledge, and courage. As with every ar...
Esther Perel
I recently reread.     source
Rekindling Desire
by Barry McCarthy (Feb 06, 2014)
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For over a decade Rekindling Desire has helped to restore and restructure sexuality in thousands of lives. This expanded edition continues the exploration of inhibited sexual desire and no-sex relationships by respected therapist Barry McCarthy, who brings decades of knowledge and the expertise that comes from having treated almost 3,000 couples fo...
Esther Perel
Barry Mc Carthy has that wonderful way of reaching us all with his inclusive, non-pathologizing model of diverse sexual styles. Be you 30 or 80 (and anything in between), you'll find Rekindling Desire accessible, user-friendly and oh, so wise. It is one of my go to books on sexuality, consider it yours.     source
Liquid Life
by Zygmunt Bauman (Jun 24, 2005)
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'Liquid life' is the kind of life commonly lived in our contemporary, liquid-modern society. Liquid life cannot stay on course, as liquid-modern society cannot keep its shape for long. Liquid life is a precarious life, lived under conditions of constant uncertainty. The most acute and stubborn worries that haunt this liquid life are the fears of be...
Esther Perel
I came one way and I finished the book and left another way.     source
The Return of Desire
A Guide to Rediscovering Your Sexual Passion
by Gina Ogden (Jul 15, 2008)
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Drawing on three decades of experience as a sex therapist and sex researcher, Dr. Gina Ogden shows you how to:- Open up to the four energies that spark desire - Create heart-to-heart communication with your partner - Transcend guilt, shame, and "good-girls-don't" messages - Help heal the sexual wounds of abuse, addiction, affairs, and low self-e...
Esther Perel
Gina Ogden probes the intricacies of female sexuality with subtle depth and understanding. I plan to recommend this book to any woman on her path to finding greater sexual self discovery and self acceptance, and ultimately ecstasy.     source
The New Monogamy
Redefining Your Relationship After Infidelity
by Tammy Nelson PhD (Jan 02, 2013)
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Everyone has their own concept of what "monogamy" means--and most people assume their partners and spouses are on the same page. Couples may assume that they are monogamous, but never discuss exactly what the monogamy agreement means to them. What happens when this implicit agreement is broken? After infidelity, relationships can become strained as...
Esther Perel
At a time when life can feel so murky and chaotic, along comes Tammy Nelson with this guidebook…. The New Monogamy is as crisp and clear as it is hopeful and realistic. A book to open again and again.     source
You Can Be Right
Looking for Love in the Age of Divorce
by Dana Adam Shapiro (Sep 17, 2013)
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A collection of candid and illuminating break-up stories resulting from three years of interviews by an Oscar-nominated documentary filmmakera wonderful and important piece of thinking and reporting (Elizabeth Gilbert). It all began as a self-help journey in the purest sense. A serial monogamist for more than two decades, Shapiro wanted to know why...
Esther Perel
As a couples therapist, I witness daily the unraveling of adult intimacies. Dana Adam Shapiro's gripping testimonies of demise and divorce are written with vividness and aplomb—I felt as if he were eavesdropping in my office. A grand reportage of marriage and its discontents.     source
Breaking the Male Code
Unlocking the Power of Friendship
by Robert Garfield (Apr 26, 2016)
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Calling for a new men’s movement, a noted psychotherapist examines the critical role close male friendships play in helping men lead happy, healthy lives.   For much of the past century, men have operated under the rules of Male Code, a rigid set of guidelines that equate masculinity with stoicism, silence, and strength. But as men’s roles have cha...
Esther Perel
I recommend for many of you.     source
Love Rules
How to Find a Real Relationship in a Digital World
by Joanna Coles (Apr 10, 2018)
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"For those looking for a smart, no-bullshit, effective guide to finding love, look no further."Esther Perel, author of Mating in Captivity"While Im not sure what Carrie Bradshaw would have made of todays new world of dating, I do know this: armed with Love Rules, she would have figured it all out in one season."Sarah Jessica ParkerSHERYL SANDBERG E...
Esther Perel
For those looking for a smart, no-bullshit, effective guide to finding love, look no further.     source
Marriage Confidential
Love in the Post-Romantic Age
by Pamela Haag (Jun 05, 2012)
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Inthis timely and thought-provoking analysis of modern coupledom, PamelaHaag& paints a vivid tableau of the semi-happy couple. Written withwit and aplomb, this page turner will instigate an insurrection against ourmarital complacency. Esther Perel, author of Matingin CaptivityWrittenwith the persuasive power of Naomi Wolf and the analytical skills ...
Esther Perel
In this timely and thought-provoking analysis of modern coupledom, Pamela Haag paints a vivid tableau of the ‘semi-happy’ couple. Written with wit and aplomb, this page turner will instigate an insurrection against our marital complacency.     source